No Laughing Matter

No Laughing Matter is the first level of the Grey Goo (Facility) world in Tasty Planet Multiverse. Being the first level, it starts out with a comic.

Backstory
After the Grey Goo grew big enough to eat universes, a group of universal gods had captured the goo and sent it to a facility to keep it from attacking or eating anything for good.

Starting Comic
(patrolling ECF guard shows the trainee around and tells him what to do)

Panel 1

 * Guard: And this is the most dangerous entity that we hold. To prevent any future disasters, we have kept him at the smallest size possible.
 * Trainee: What is it?

Panel 2

 * (focuses on the cube) Guard: That is the Grey Goo, a blob that has grown to eat universe sizes, and if it continued, ooooh boy, I'd just thank the omni-dimensional lords that he had been captured.

Panel 3

 * Trainee: Interesting, is it at the center...
 * (Alarm sounds)

Panel 4

 * Guard: Security Breach! Some blasted traitor has broken an enclosure! I just hope the electricity hasn't been tampered with!
 * Trainee: What? What do you mean???
 * Guard: C'mon, we got to get to the breach and solve this immediately!

Panel 5
(as the guard and trainee run towards the problem, the camera zooms in on the Grey Goo holding room, showing the temperature of the room dramatically rising to 60 degrees Kelvin)

Panel 6
(zooms in on Grey Goo at the smallest level possible, noticing a change)

Details

 * Starting size: 1 x 10-100000m
 * Required size: 21.3 am

Edible Objects

 * Dark Matter: Starting size
 * Anti-Top Quark: Starting size
 * Anti-Bottom Quark: 1 x 10-10000m
 * Anti-Planet Quark: 1 x 10-1000m
 * Anti-Sand Quark: 1 x 10-900m
 * Anti Charm Quark: 1 x 10-104m
 * Anti Strange Quark: 1 x 10-103m
 * Anti Up Quark: 1 x 10-100m
 * Anti Down Quark: 1 x 10-100m
 * Planck Area: 2.61 x 10-70m
 * Planck Time: 1 x 10-43m
 * Space Time Fabric: 1 x 10-35m
 * String Fabric: 1 x 10-35m
 * Antiproton/Antineutron: 1 x 10-35m
 * Quantum Foam: 1 PL (Planck length)
 * Black Hole Singularity: 1.25 PL
 * Muon: 2.76 PL
 * Lepton: 25 PL
 * Dark Energy: 62.5 PL
 * Positron: 172 PL
 * Photon: 187 PL
 * Fermion: 2031 PL
 * Gluon: 3125 PL
 * Graviton: 3 x 10-30m
 * Tachyon: 7.5 x 10-30m
 * Beta Particle: 9.1 x 10-30m
 * W Boson: 1 x 10-26m
 * Alpha Particle: 6.64 x 10-26m
 * Neutrino: 1 ym (yoctometer)
 * Tau Neutrino: 1 ym
 * Muon Neutrino: 1 ym
 * MeV Neutrino: 2 ym
 * Electron Neutrino: 5 ym
 * Anti-Hydrogen: 7.5 ym
 * Perpetual Motion Particle: 10 ym
 * Energy Neutrino: 10 ym
 * Solar Neutrino: 91 ym
 * Top Quark: 100 ym
 * f-Meson: 400 ym
 * Phi-Meson: 1.02 zm
 * Preon: 2 zm
 * B Meson: 5.27 zm
 * Upsilon Meson: 9.46 zm
 * High Energy Neutrino: 14 zm
 * Bottom Quark: 30 zm
 * Planet Quark: 45 zm
 * Sand Quark: 50 zm
 * Charm Quark: 100 zm
 * Cosmic Ray: 120 zm
 * Sterile Neutrino: 200 zm
 * Strange Quark: 400 zm
 * J/Psi Meson: 496 zm
 * Up Quark: 1 am
 * Down Quark: 1 am

Trivia

 * Is a "pun" out of the phrase "no laughing matter," but with emphasis on matter.